When It’s Difficult to Keep Your Cool

This is one of my weaknesses – to keep my cool.

But most say, it is my strength – that I know how to keep my cool.

Probably, yes. Maybe. I really don’t know. But this I know – I’m working on it.

And if they say, I’m good at it, then I’m happy.

[Image courtesy of imagerymajestic / FreeDigitalPhotos.net]

But it is also a fact that it is a challenge for me to keep my cool when it’s difficult to keep cool. Of course, that’s why you say it’s difficult!

Good thing – I’m learning in the process.

In my journey, here’s what I realized: When you are angry and you shout and speak, there’s a tendency that you’ll say something that you’ll regret.

I know because I have experienced it. There were a lot of times that I regretted saying something – especially on those heated times of anger.

But here’s also a good thing: I am learning how to keep my cool.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

If possible, don’t speak up immediately when you are angry. But when you need to speak up, then pause for a moment. Keep silent for some seconds before you speak.

In better times, circumstances may allow you and you need not speak up. During those times, keeping silent won’t be enough. What you do is to divert your attention to something else.

I do this and I think it works.

I still make mistakes but I’m working on it.

So there, if you need to speak amidst anger – keep silent for some seconds before speaking.

And if you don’t need to speak, divert your attention to something else then get back to it later when the anger subsides.

One example is when you receive a bad email. There were times, I received these kinds and responded head on. I’m not proud of it even how I thought eloquent my response was. I have made a mistake because it stirred up a long thread of heated e-mail exchanges.

What I’m striving to do now is that when I receive these kinds and feel anger heating up, I close my email first and do something else. I feel the anger but I try not to respond immediately.

It’s difficult to do.

But when I’m able to do it, wow! I feel peace. It soothes me.

There are even times when you don’t need to get back at it later because it was an email not worth spending time at all.

Yes, we make mistakes. But it is also a good thing to strive to better ourselves despite our weakness.

This is a challenge for you and me – to keep your cool especially in times when it’s difficult to keep your cool.

Feeling the anger and acknowledging it is but normal but the way to respond to it can be chosen – and this is what I call keeping my cool.

Next time, when it’s getting tough, you know what to do. Keep your cool.

Live your life, young mind!

Chris Dao-anis

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